8 SOUTHERN THAILAND FOLK TALES

Foreword…

It all started a few years ago in a discussion with our English Major Students. We were talking about regional differences; how perceptions of people differ. I explained how people in the north of England view the folks from London and the south, and vice-versa. “It’s the same here in Thailand” one bright student chimed, “the folks in Bangkok and the north think everyone down here in the south are stupid, ignorant and to be viewed with extreme suspicion. But we have a very rich cultural heritage” she went on to explain. “We have history and stories that have been passed from father to son, from mother to daughter, for centuries.”

So, it was agreed, the students would mine the Southern Thai Culture for the myths and legends that go to make folk tales. These would be documented and translated into English. This was to be a useful extra-curricular activity in the student’s quest for better English usage and understanding.
The project ‘grew like Topsy’ and before long we had plans afoot to publish a small book that could, with a bit of luck, help to narrow the cultural divide between north and south Thailand. And, of course, educate and amuse us poor, ignorant, foreigners! Together with my friend and former colleague, Ajarn Kevin Marshall, we agreed to edit the student’s submissions, bring the often-archaic language up-to-date and inject modern usage and idioms whilst retaining the spirit of the original.

It was a big idea but one that, ultimately, came to naught. Students became involved in the imperatives of finals and left to make their way in the world. I moved on and the whole project gathered dust, if that’s the right expression, on the hard drive of my laptop. Gathered dust that is, until a few weeks ago while in conversation with Dennis Peacock on one of his welcome visits to the Province of Songkhla…

http://www.escati.com/songkhla.htm

I hope you enjoy reading these unpublished stories from what is a very rich and largely unknown, cultural heritage…

The secondary plan to publish a hard copy is, of course, still an option. Any readers’ comments on the idea would be most welcome. Illustrations would be needed…Any artists out there?
We could get sponsorship to meet printing costs and proceeds from sales could be used to help educate youngsters from the poorer families in the area. A worthwhile cause indeed! Just a thought…

Rod Norman

Note: Rod Norman is currently a Lecturer with the Faculty of Management Sciences at Prince of Songkla University, Hat Yai. Kevin Marshall lectures at Rajabhat Songkhla University and the dozen or so unnamed students who did all the hard work, are now spread far and wide throughout the Kingdom and overseas…

http://www.international.psu.ac.th

1. It’s All in the Stars…

You may find this hard to believe, but once, the planets we see sparkling in the heavens, all lived as real people. It’s true! The planet Jupiter was born a hermit, and the Sun was born a prince of a large city. The prince studied with the hermit who was a wise and learned man. He learned everything he thought he needed to know and much more, and he graduated with honours.
After the graduation ceremony, the Sun prince prepared to return to his palace in the city. But before he could begin his journey, hermit Jupiter called him over to where he sat, congratulated him on his academic achievements and presented a gift. The gift was a beautiful young lady called Jan. She was the Moon.
The Sun prince and the Moon lady returned to the city and were married. The years passed happily for the heavenly couple in the palace. The Sun prince often thought about the hermit Jupiter and one day he decided to pay him a State Visit. Naturally, he took his wife Jan, the Moon lady, with him too.
On their very first night at Jupiter’s house, an evil and unscrupulous character called Mars sneaked into the Moon lady’s chamber and using all his considerable wiles, seduced her. The next day, the hermit told the Sun prince about the union between the Moon lady and Mars. Understandably, the prince was very angry and challenged Mars to a duel to the death. A fearful battle ensued and after what seemed like forever to the watching people, Mars threw down his sword and fled never to be seen again!
This sad story of evil and betrayal is why Jupiter and the Sun are forever friends, and the Moon and Mars are friends. But Jupiter and the Sun are never seen with Mars and the Sun never talks to the Moon. Check it out, ask anyone and they’ll tell you the same.

2. Good Breeding…

When the world was new, no creature knew anything about reproduction. They all recognized it was important but didn’t know when they could and should breed. After a good deal of discussion it was agreed that each species should send a representative to the great God and ask him when they could reproduce. The dogs’ representative arrived first, followed by the cows’, the buffalos’, mans’: all the creatures formed an orderly queue and waited their turn to see the great God.
The great God told the dog that they could reproduce about the ninth or tenth of the month. He told the cow and buffalo that they could reproduce on or about the fifth or sixth of the month. He was just about to talk to the snakes and lizards when there was a commotion and the man came barging to the front and asked when mankind could breed.
God was a little taken aback by this effrontery and demanded to know why the man had jumped the queue. “Because I am very busy, said the man, “and I cannot afford to waste time standing in line with all these lowly creatures. All I want to know is when we humans can reproduce.”
“You are busy all the time,” said God, holding his temper, “perhaps ….”
But the man had gone! Without waiting for God to even finish his sentence the man had rushed back and told everybody that God had said we can breed ‘all the time’!
And so it is, to this very day, people have been reproducing all the time.

3. Soft Rice…

Pohnae was a dim-witted man but his wife, Mohnae, was very smart. It was the time of planting but they didn’t have any rice to sow. As was usual in cases like this, Mohnae asked her husband to go and borrow some from a neighbour. “But only get soft rice” she said, “because it will grow quickly and we can repay the debt sooner”.
Carrying a large jar, Pohnae went from house to house in the village asking to borrow rice. But, everyone he spoke to only had the hard species. He continued his quest without luck until he came to his old friend’s house a few kilometers outside the village centre. Pohnae’s friend was threshing last season’s crop in preparation for new sowing.
“What species is that?” enquired Pohnae.
“Soft” replied his friend.
“May I borrow some?” asked Pohnae.
“Of course” said his friend, “but you’ll have to help me finish the winnowing so we can fill your jar.”
With a jar full of soft rice hoisted on his shoulder, Pohnae set off for home. On the bridge crossing the stream not far from home, Pohnae stumbled, fell and the contents of the jar spilled into the water. He looked in dismay and then he saw that some grains were rising and floating on the surface. Quickly he scooped as many as he could, put them into the jar and set off, once again for home.
“How can you be sure it’s the soft species of rice?” asked Mohnae peering suspiciously into the jar.
“It’s the soft rice for sure,” said Pohnae and he told her about his accident on the bridge and that he had managed to collect all the grains that floated. “It must be soft,” he said with a knowing grin, “all the hard rice sank!”
Mohnae looked at her husband in astonishment and, shaking her head, muttered under her breath, “You are probably the silliest man I have ever known. But you have a good heart.” And with that, she set off to find a more soft rice for the planting.

4. Cows & Buffaloes…

Long ago when the world was new, the god, Isawara, thought it would be a good idea to have some ‘practical’ animals in the world. He decided to make cows to give milk and meat, and buffaloes to add strength to the many menial tasks that lay ahead for the folks of the ‘new’ world.
Being of a practical turn of mind, Isawara thought it prudent to make scale models of the new animals. He’d seen some of the oddities already living on the earth. The Duck-billed Platypus for example, constantly made him smile. “It must have been designed by a committee” he thought, “good job it’s confined to that place they call Oz where the Wizard can look after it! I’m not having any sort of design foul-ups with my cows and buffaloes.”
So, Isawara painstakingly drew plans, made alterations and went through many design concepts before he was satisfied. Then he made exact scale models of each animal. He made the models of the buffalo from bee’s wax which was a handy local commodity and the bees didn’t charge much! The cow however, began to pose problems; the udder arrangements with the drooping bits didn’t work in wax because it was just too soft and pliable, and wouldn’t hold shape. After several attempts, Isawara abandoned wax in favour of clay which offered more rigidity. And clay was free!
Before long he had two magnificently detailed models and he was satisfied. But the design and building schedule was way behind and summer had arrived. It became too hot to do any serious work like creating new animals for the world. “It will have to wait until the cooler weather” said Isawara settling down for a nap in true Thai style.
He was just nodding off when a nasty thought occurred to him. “If it gets too hot the buffalo will melt into a yuckie blob: can’t have that!” So, he put the model of the buffalo into the pond where the water was cool. He was just about to do the same for the cow when it struck him that the clay would melt in the water and he’d have another yuckie mess on his hands. The problem was simply solved: Isawara built a shelter. It was so simple, the clay cow would keep cool in the shade and be sheltered from any unexpected rain.
When the cooler weather came, Isawara put his new animals into production. They worked straight out of the box!
And that’s how it happened. To this day you’ll see buffaloes wallowing about in muddy ponds and cows taking shelter anywhere that’s dry.

5. The Adventures of Nai Raeng…

A long time ago, there was a couple who lived in a small village near Pattalung on the northeast shore of Songkhla Lake. They had been married for many years but remained childless. They loved children and so wanted one of their own. They prayed every day for God to grant their wish. Nothing happened. In desperation, they went along to the temple and asked the Abbot for his help.
“Take a small pebble from the edge of the lake,” said the Abbot who was a very wise man, “wrap it in white cloth, make your wish and put it under your pillow.” The couple followed the Abbot’s advice, religiously. They prayed very hard.
Finally, the wife became pregnant and the couple were so very happy. As the baby grew inside her she began to eat and eat and eat. “You must remember, dear husband, I am eating for two,” she explained. But even so, she was eating much more than the average person and for nine months she ate and ate and ate!
When she came to term, she gave birth to a big, healthy, baby boy. In fact, he was very big indeed; so big they named him Nai Raeng (raeng means strength or power). And he had a huge appetite just like his mother when she was carrying him! He ate one pan of boiled rice; ten bunches of bananas and drank milk all the time. He always seemed to be eating and his parents began to despair for they simply couldn’t afford to feed him. The situation became so serious that his parents began to wish the unthinkable: they began to wish he had never been born! He ate and ate and ate; and grew and grew and grew.
When Nai Raeng was about ten years old, his father asked him to cut down the biggest tree in the forest. “We need firewood for the winter,” his father explained, “see what you can do.” To his shame, his father secretly hoped his huge son would meet with a tragic accident. Instead Nai Raeng felled the tree safety, chopped it into suitably sized firewood and carried the bundles back to the cottage. Still he ate and ate and ate and the more hard work his father asked him to do simply increased his appetite.
One day a Chinese trading junk moored close to the village. “This is our chance,” thought the parent and persuaded the trader to sign Nai Raeng as a deckhand on the junk. “Look,” said the father, “he is a big strong boy. He will be able to do the work of ten men.” The trader agreed and took the boy aboard. The junk sailed away with Nai Raeng aboard.
It wasn’t long after the junk had put to sea, the trader realised his mistake: the boy was eating all the food and the crew began running out of supplies. “The boy simply has to go,” the trader confided to the boatswain. “Let’s challenge him to catch a dolphin,” suggested the bo’sun, “when he’s in the water, we can simply leave him.” And that’s exactly what happened. Just as soon as Nai Raeng dived into the sea, the junk hoisted sail and left.
Nai Raeng began to swim towards the shore; he could swim very well. As he began to wade ashore he spied an old, sunken, fishing boat. Using his enormous strength, he dragged the wreck ashore and set about repairing it. It wasn’t too difficult and after a few days he had a seaworthy craft and set sail for home. When he arrived, his parents were truly glad to see him and, regretting their earlier bad thoughts, agreed to take him back into the family home. Nai Raeng quickly found himself a good job and earned enough money to feed his considerable appetite and have spare cash to help his parents. Everyone was very happy.
As the years passed, Nai Raeng became older and wiser, and much respected in the community. So popular and well liked was he that he was asked to become Governor of the region: a great honour and one that Nai Raeng relished.
Some time into his tenure, Nai Raeng received news that there was to be a great festival in Nakhorn Sri Thammarat, a city in the very north of his fiefdom. This was to be an important occasion for some relics of the Lord Buddha himself were to be interred in the ancient pagoda. Every village, town and city in the South arranged to have money and gifts sent to the pagoda to pay respects. Nai Raeng, himself, personally loaded a boat with 900,000 Baht in gold and he and his entourage set sail up the coast to Nakhorn.
On the way north, a great storm blew in from the northeast. It raged and raged and Nai Raeng’s boat was pushed south and closer, and closer, to the shore. Suddenly a huge wave swept the fragile craft aground and smashed it against the rocks. It was badly damaged and needed some serious repairs. They would certainly miss the ceremony and the honour of paying respects to the remains. Nai Raeng was deeply saddened and ordered his men to carry the gold ashore and bury it somewhere safe. He then ordered his own death and instructed that his severed head be placed atop the treasure. Naturally, the Governor’s orders were obeyed to the letter and so ended the adventures of Nai Raeng.

Editor’s note: there are, indeed, relics of the Lord Buddha in Wat Phra Mahathat, Nakhorn Sri Thammarat and visitors to Songkhla may care to visit a small fishing village on the southern end of Chalatat Beach called Khao Seng, a corruption of gow saeng or 900,000! Also, there is a large boulder on a rocky outcrop; this is called Hua Nai Raeng (Nai Raeng’s head). Local legend has it that Nai Raeng’s spirit still guards his treasure. Perhaps there’s more than a grain of truth in folklore!…

6. The Malicious Daughter…

Once, long ago, there was a couple who had three beautiful daughters. The oldest daughter was lazy; the middle daughter was careless and had many boyfriends while the youngest was very talkative and loved to gossip. She loved gossiping so much, she loved to start arguments by spreading rumours.
All the local people hated the daughters and the youngest in particular because of her fondness for creating malicious rumours. The parents were very embarrassed by the behaviour of their children; so embarrassed were they that they decided their offspring should leave the home and move away from the village. Naturally, the daughters objected and refused to leave. In desperation the coupled begged the neighbours to help capture the rogue females, tie them up, put them on a raft and send them down the river into exile. All the villagers willingly helped and before long the daughters were launched downstream.
After a few hours adrift and at the mercy of the current, a renowned local pirate spied the raft. He rescued the girls and, in true pirate fashion, made them his ‘wives’. The pirate was quickly able to adjust to the behaviour of the eldest and middle daughter but he couldn’t stand the gossiping of the youngest. So, again in true pirate fashion, he got rid of her by throwing her into the ocean. Fortunately a pair of sea eagles saw the girl’s plight and, while one circled overhead, the other went ashore, picked up a log, returned and dropped it for the hapless girl. She clung to the log and the current took her to land.
Once on dry land the eagles swooped down and picked up the girl and flew high into the sky. Naturally, as was her way, the daughter needed to chatter, She teased the male eagle and whispered to her mate that her husband was cheating on her. The female eagle became furious and very jealous and the girl relished the trouble she was causing. It was an impossible situation and so, reluctantly, the eagles dropped her. She died in the sea and fed the fishes.
Some years later a monk saw a skull that had been washed up on the beach. He picked it up and thought it would make an ideal incense holder for the Chanting Room. Before long the monks began to argue amongst themselves. They suspected the newly installed skull was the problem so they removed it from the Chanting Room and made it into a water scoop for the bathroom. All at once the monks became ill and broke out into rashes all over their bodies. It was clearly the skull causing all these problems. One brave individual picked it up and threw it with all his might into the cemetery where a gang of thieves quickly found it. Just as soon as they started examining the skull, it began exerting its evil influence and the thieves fell to fighting amongst themselves. They made so much noise, an old monk threw them out of the cemetery, grabbed the skull, burned it and scattered the ashes to the four winds.
It was truly the end for the malicious young daughter. So be warned, those of you who enjoy gossiping ….

7. The Man Who Didn’t Sell Earthen Pots…

Once, long ago, there was a man who lived in a small village. He was a very lazy man, lazy in every way. He was so lazy that he was unmarried and alone because no woman loved him or wanted to be with him.
He had a little money left to him by his parents and that sustained him in his oh-so-lazy lifestyle. He never planned for the future, never bothered with day-to-day housekeeping and certainly never cared for anything except eating, sleeping and generally relaxing his life away. He was, however, destined for a very rude awakening.
One morning, as the sun rose high in the sky, he rubbed the sleep from his eyes and stumbled into the kitchen for his breakfast. There was no food; all the pots, bags and baskets were empty. Worse still, the pouch were he kept his money was empty too! It lay on the floor where he had carelessly dropped it, limp and shriveled.
“Oh, dear,” he thought as he stifled a yawn, “what am I to do?” He sat for a while and contemplated the situation. Finally, he decided to stroll to the market to clear his head and see if the hustle and bustle of normal daily life gave him any clues as to what to do next. As always, the market was a hive of activity: people jostled, bargained, wagered, smiled, laughed and scolded. The fruit and vegetable stalls were busy as was the meat counter. Money, that precious commodity he unexpectedly didn’t have on that day, was changing hands everywhere. Even the old pot seller was doing well. There he sat on his haunches stroking his pots as though they were living things and describing each item to an attentive and appreciative audience. Pots were exchanged for coins every few minutes. “Now, that’s something I could do,” thought the lazy man, “not much effort for a reasonable return. I could stroke pots!” So, with unaccustomed energy and enthusiasm, he ambled off to the pot factory on the outskirts of the village.
After protracted negotiations with the potter who didn’t believe the lazy man capable of anything, least of all selling pots, they agreed on a sale-or-return arrangement. The pot maker would advance the lazy man a quantity of pots which he would pay for at the end of the day. There wasn’t much risk for the pot maker. In truth, the thought of the lazy man actually working for a living caused him great amusement and that was worth every satang he risked. The pot maker loaned the lazy man a cart, loaded it with pots and, trying to suppress a chuckle, wished him luck and waved him off.
On the way back to the market the lazy man became very tired. “This is harder work than I expected,” he muttered, “I simply must rest.” He stopped at an abandoned, broken-down shelter, went inside, lay on the floor and immediately fell sound asleep. After all his exertions, he had a troubled sleep: he dreamt he sold many pots to many people. He was a great success. With all the money he made he dreamt he bought a big elephant. A fine beast! He rode in state to market every day to sell his pots, and every day the people would gasp in awe at his success and riches. “It is a fine lifestyle,” thought the lazy man consumed by his own self-importance. Suddenly, one fine morning as he rode to work, a mouse ran in front of the elephant! Now, everyone knows elephants are afraid of mice, and not unexpectedly, the elephant panicked and charged to the left and charged to the right and reared and bucked! The pots fell from their baskets and the lazy man had the greatest difficulty in holding on.
The lazy man awoke from his dream with a start to find the hut falling down around him! There were beams crashing down, dirt, dust and debris everywhere! He ran from the chaos and saved himself. But he couldn’t save his pots; they lay shattered on the floor! His pots were broken and his dream of riches was broken too.
“Oh well,” said the lazy man as he settled down on the ground, “something will turn up.” And with that happy thought, he fell sound asleep.

8. The Miser…

Many years ago there was an old man. He lived in a hut close to the forest where, every morning, he went in search of large tree branches and logs. He was a wood carver by trade and a very good one at that. His expertise, honed over many years, was in great demand particularly for his amazing likenesses of animal’s heads. Buffaloes, deer, dogs, cats, and squirrels – his talents knew no bounds. He was in great demand and he made a good living. Every coin he earned was carefully put away in a bag and hidden in a very safe place in the granary. He was very, very careful with his money.
At the end of every day he would retrieve his money bag, empty it, count the coins, count them again just to make sure, and return his stash to it’s secret place. Although he was very, very careful with his money, there came a time when his expenses exceeded his income. Inflation began to bite even in the backwoods and the old man became seriously worried. So worried did he become that every minute of every day was consumed by his anxiety. He even dreamt about his dwindling money supply.
One particularly windy night he had a dream; a nightmare would be a better way to describe it. He dreamt his coins actually talked to him! They told him they were bored with being counted and recounted every night; bored with being hidden away in a smelly old bag and, above all, bored with each other’s company. They told him they would go off, see something of the world and meet new coin friends.
The old man woke in a cold sweat. He rushed to the granary, retrieved his moneybag and counted the coins and recounted them just to make sure none of them has escaped to find new friends. All was as it should be but the old man believed his dream and he didn’t trust his coins. He pushed the moneybag into a hole in an old log and, as a precaution against any of his precious hoard escaping, he sealed opening with clay and put the log under his house.
The following night there was a storm. The wind blew even harder and the rain lashed down. It was the worst storm in years, so much rain had fallen that the river burst its banks and flooded the whole area. Everything was swept up by the torrent. Everything that could float, and some things you would never believe could float, was swept away including, of course, the old man’s secret log ‘bank’.
When dawn broke the old man couldn’t believe his eyes. The whole area was devastated and most seriously his secret log was gone. He searched high and low in every nook and cranny of the neighborhood and further afield. He never did find the log for the flood and carried it far, far away.
Who knows? Perhaps the coins found some new friends after all.

Join us & Escape to Thailand…The Land of Happy Smiles…

http://www.escati.com/thailand_of_escati.htm

Keep smiling!

Yours truly

7 SOUTHERN THAILAND FOLK TALES

Foreword…

It all started a few years ago in a discussion with our English Major Students. We were talking about regional differences; how perceptions of people differ. I explained how people in the north of England view the folks from London and the south, and vice-versa. “It’s the same here in Thailand” one bright student chimed, “the folks in Bangkok and the north think everyone down here in the south are stupid, ignorant and to be viewed with extreme suspicion. But we have a very rich cultural heritage” she went on to explain. “We have history and stories that have been passed from father to son, from mother to daughter, for centuries.”

So, it was agreed, the students would mine the Southern Thai Culture for the myths and legends that go to make folk tales. These would be documented and translated into English. This was to be a useful extra-curricular activity in the student’s quest for better English usage and understanding.
The project ‘grew like Topsy’ and before long we had plans afoot to publish a small book that could, with a bit of luck, help to narrow the cultural divide between north and south Thailand. And, of course, educate and amuse us poor, ignorant, foreigners! Together with my friend and former colleague, Ajarn Kevin Marshall, we agreed to edit the student’s submissions, bring the often-archaic language up-to-date and inject modern usage and idioms whilst retaining the spirit of the original.

It was a big idea but one that, ultimately, came to naught. Students became involved in the imperatives of finals and left to make their way in the world. I moved on and the whole project gathered dust, if that’s the right expression, on the hard drive of my laptop. Gathered dust that is, until a few weeks ago while in conversation with Dennis Peacock on one of his welcome visits to the Province of Songkhla…

http://www.escati.com/hat_yai.htm

I hope you enjoy reading this handful of stories from what is a very rich and largely unknown, cultural heritage…

The secondary plan to publish a hard copy is, of course, still an option. Any readers’ comments on the idea would be most welcome. Illustrations would be needed…Any artists out there?
We could get sponsorship to meet printing costs and proceeds from sales could be used to help educate youngsters from the poorer families in the area. A worthwhile cause indeed! Just a thought…

Rod Norman

Note: Rod Norman is currently a Lecturer with the Faculty of Management Sciences at Prince of Songkla University, Hat Yai. Kevin Marshall lectures at Rajabhat Songkhla University and the dozen or so unnamed students who did all the hard work, are now spread far and wide throughout the Kingdom and overseas…

http://www.international.psu.ac.th

1. The New Sheriff…

Sheriff Chalerm was a man who was very talented at catching thieves and solving crime of all hues. So talented was he that his boss moved him to a ‘high crime area’. “See what you can do about the problems there,” his boss instructed him.
The very first night he arrived in the village, someone stole Grandmother Cherm’s betel leaves. New Sheriff Chalerm was immediately called in to solve the case. The first thing he did was to ask the Headman of the village to call a meeting of all the villagers at the local school.
At the meeting Sheriff Chalerm stood in front of everybody, introduced himself and asked the betel leaf thief to step forward and confess. No one stepped forward. He then promised not to punish the perpetrator but, still, no one stepped forward. Sheriff Chalerm was disappointed but not dismayed. He then said something very strange: “I would like each and every one of you to step forward and rap Grandmother Cherm once, on top of her head”. Everyone thought this was very odd indeed, especially Grandmother Cherm who thought it very silly but went along with the pantomime in any case. Each person in the room approached the old lady in turn, paid deep respect and gently rapped her once on her head.
Then a man stepped forward and he was obviously distressed. He quickly rapped Grandmother Cherm on the head, not once but three times! Sheriff Chalerm, being a sleuth of amazing insight, recognized guilt when he saw it and immediately arrested the man. Grandmother Cherm rubbed the top of her head, thanked the new Sheriff for his wit and wisdom and asked if he would arrange for the return of her betel leaves as soon as possible. Sheriff Chalerm smiled, promised he would do all he could to have her property returned and carted the thief off to gaol.

2. The Ring & the Husband…

Once, there was a family who built its house close to the southern border of Thailand. The husband and wife had one son and a couple of cows, and although they were very poor, both parents desperately wanted their boy educated in the big town nearby. So, to meet the cost of their son’s education, they decided to sell one of the cows.
Father put a halter on the cow and led it away towards town and the slaughterhouse. When he arrived he was disappointed to find the place closed: it was a national holiday. “We really must get a decent calendar,” he muttered and turned for home.
On his way back he met a man feeding a horse, a man feeding a goat, a man feeding a pig and a man selling Khao Yum – a delicious rice salad. After a few minutes discussion, the father decided to exchange his cow for the horse and then swap the horse for the goat. Then he traded the goat for the pig and finally, struck a bargain with the food seller to take the pig in exchange for some Khao Yum.
The father was just leaving the foodstall when he met a good friend from the same village. He showed him the bag of Khao Yum and proudly related how he’d changed the cow for a horse, the horse for a goat, the goat for a pig and finally the pig for the bag of food. “What!” said his stunned friend; “ I think that is the stupidest deal I’ve ever heard of. What are you going to tell your wife when you arrive back with just a bag of food? She’ll do her pieces!”
“No she won’t,” said the father, “she is a good and reasonable woman. We have been together for years and never had an argument; she will understand how successful I’ve been.”
“Rubbish!” said the friend, “I know women. She’ll curse you for a fool and you’ll be lucky to escape with all your body parts! But, if you’re right, and she doesn’t call you a worthless idiot, I’ll give you the price you would have received for the cow had you sold it properly in the first place.”
“Done!” said the father, “let’s go back to my house.” So off they went together, the father clutching the bag of food and his friend shaking his head in total disbelief.
When the husband arrived home, he greeted his wife, handed her the bag of food and proudly told her the whole story. His wife listened quietly and patiently without saying a word and, when the tale was over, she calmly opened the bag and tasted the food. It was good. Very good indeed. She beckoned her son, her husband and his friend to join her and they all sat down to enjoy the simple feast.
When the wife was clearing away, the friend turned to the father in amazement: “I simply don’t believe it,” he said, “how could she remain so calm after what you did?”
“Ah!” said the father knowingly, “she really is a good woman and she proved the old saying – a ring is only good if it has a precious stone, and a husband is only good if he has a precious wife.”
True to his word, the friend paid cash to the value of the cow and the son received a good education.

3. The Stupid Man…

Once upon a time there was a young man who lived with his mother. He was sheltered, unaware and sometimes a very silly young man. Young men are often very silly indeed. One fine, spring, morning, his mother suggested it was high time he went out and found himself a wife. “But” she said, “make sure she’s a good woman. And” she continued, “make sure she’s a neat and a peaceful woman.” He listened to his mother’s wise words because he wanted very much to please her and make her happy.
He quickly packed a small bundle and left his house to find a suitable wife. As he walked he saw a woman picking vegetables. He looked at her carefully. She certainly was attractive he thought but then he remembered his mother’s words. “No” he thought, “she’s not neat and peaceful, she’s much too active and hard working. She won’t do.” Then he saw another woman washing clothes in the stream. She was moving quickly, scrubbing, rinsing and wringing. She was certainly not still and neat and so was rejected as unsuitable.
Another few hours of walking brought him to a small house in a clearing. There were many people around the house, milling around in groups, talking in hushed tones. He walked closer and saw a beautiful woman lying down and looking very peaceful indeed. “Ah” he exclaimed, “this is the woman for me!” He picked her up; she was very light and fragile, and carried her home. He put her in his room and rushed off to tell his mother that he found a wife who was very neat and very peaceful. He so wanted to please his mother and she seemed pleased by his news.
Three days later, the man’s mother smelled a very unpleasant odour coming from her son’s room. Puzzled, she asked him to open his room so that she could have a look inside. She immediately saw the dead body! Horrified, the woman told her son that the person he took to be his wife was dead. “It’s obvious she’s dead” she exclaimed, “if nothing else, you can tell by the way she smells. Living people do not smell like that!” She explained that dead people must be buried and not kept in houses with the living. “Go and bury her at once!” So, with a heavy heart, the man took his wife outside and buried her.
When he came back into the house, he felt very sad. He thought he had found a good wife, but it was not so. How disappointed he was for both himself and his mother! He so wanted to make her happy and be proud of him. So, he went to her to talk and seek comfort in her words. When he approached her, he smelled a very unpleasant odour. The odour was not unlike the way his wife had smelled. He remembered his mother’s wise words that you could tell dead people by their smell and that they should be buried, not kept in houses with living people. He knew what he had to do. So, he picked up his mother, took her outside and buried her alongside his wife. With both women deep in the ground, the unhappy man was alone but content that he had followed his mother’s advice. He slowly walked back to the house and busied himself clearing away the remains of a plate of cabbage and beans his mother had eaten that morning.

4. The Lampu Tree and the Firefly…

Long ago, a young boy and a young girl grew up in the same, small, village. They saw each other every day and as the years passed they grew to love one another. They loved each other very much and wanted to marry. But, as is so often the case, their parents did not want them to be together. The girl’s parents in particular, did not care for the young man believing their daughter could do so much better for herself. “She could marry into a landowning family, or even royalty,” they agreed. “She’s a pretty girl, she could go live in a city, find a good job and be certain to meet many more suitable young men.”
It all became too much for the young lady. All the bickering. All the unpleasantness. In a mood of desperation she ran away from home. Her parents were very angry and demanded the young man tell them where their daughter was. But the young man didn’t know; she hadn’t spoken to him for days and he knew nothing of her plan to run away. Reluctantly the young woman’s parents believed him and mounted a search party.
All the villagers joined in and for days they combed the paddy fields, the jungle and the nearby mountains. On the third day they found her. She had hanged herself on a tree near the canal.
When the young man heard the tragic news, he became distraught. He decided to join her and, with a sigh, fell on his knife. As he was dying, he made a wish that he and his love should to be together for all eternity. His wish came true. The young lady was reincarnated as a willow tree and he was reborn as a firefly. They still live happily together. Take a look outside on any Summer’s night, near any canal and you’ll see them.

5. Why Cats Hate Rats…

Once upon a time, there was a cat and a rat. They were good friends and lived together on a small island not very far from here. As happens from time to time, it had been a bad year. The fishing was not good and the rice harvest had failed. The people on the island had, slowly, drifted away in search of a better and more stable life. Pretty soon there was no one left on the island except the cat and the rat. Soon, they too, ran out of food and, like the people, decide to head for the mainland. But how to get there?
The cat and the rat puzzled over the problem for some time. Eventually, in true Thai style, they decided to form a committee to examine the viability of forming a sub-committee with a view to establishing the perameters within which the main committee, which was yet to be established, should operate. Several sub-committees were formed but unfortunately they neglected to circulate the minutes of their various and many meetings. The right paw didn’t know what the left paw was doing and organisational chaos ensued! Finally, common sense prevailed. All the committees were dissolved and replaced by a working party that unanimously voted to accept the Mission Statement penned by one of the earlier committees; it said, “Escape to the mainland is the first priority.” And, with these wise words ringing in their ears, the cat and the rat set to work.
After some searching they found a suitable log and chewed at it until it resembled a kind of boat-thing, which the cat and the rat had seen the humans using. They pushed it into the water and it floated! So, with spirits soaring, they waved a fond farewell to the island and set sail.
They made good time and soon the mainland was in sight. But the wind and the tide were not kind. After several days aimlessly drifting about, spirits sank and hunger began to set in. The rat became so ravenous, it began gnawing at the wood and, before the cat could step in, the boat sprang a leak and quickly sank. Fortunately, rats can swim very well and, although they don’t care for water, cats can swim too. After a while they crawled up the beach to safety. The cat raised an angry claw and snarled: “You are such a stupid rat, you nearly drowned us. I’ll get you ….!” His threat faded as the cat fell sound asleep, exhausted by the long swim. When he woke, the cat was alone; the dirty rat had slunk away. So, with vows of vengeance heaped upon his former friend, the cat set off to make a new life for himself.
And that, dear readers, is why, to this day, cats really hate rats.

6. Why Cockerels Crow Every Morning…

Long ago when the Earth was new, there were ten suns in the sky. The ten suns all rose at the same time, so the Earth was a very bright place. But it was also very hot; very hot indeed! It was so unbearably hot that people, animals and plants suffered and died. The people who were left wanted to find a way to kill some of the suns to reduce the light and the heat so it was more comfortable. Eventually, they found a man who they thought could do the job. He was an archer, a very famous archer. His name was Dan.
Every day, Dan would shoot at the suns; he shot one arrow at every sun, on the hour every hour. As the days passed, Dan became more and more accurate and the suns became more and more nervous. They didn’t want to be punctured! One day, the suns decided they had had enough of dodging arrows and took themselves off to a world where their light and warmth would be better appreciated.
Of course, without the suns’ rays it was very dark and very cold on the Earth. Nothing could live in the darkness and the people, animals and plants began to die. The people realized how stupid and selfish they had been and were very sorry. They begged the ten suns to come back and shine their light and heat on the Earth. But nothing happened. Day after day, the people shouted, prayed, set off fireworks, sang songs and lit bonfires. Still nothing happened; the suns stayed away.
One day, a cockerel thought he would try his drumstick at bringing the suns back. He began crowing as loudly as he could. He crowed and crowed and crowed. Now, it’s a well-known fact that suns have very sensitive hearing and the racket that was coming from the Earth did nothing for them. Nothing at all except for one sun. It was tone deaf and was strangely attracted to the noise the cockerel was making. The sun peered over the eastern horizon to better hear the cockerel’s calling. The closer the sun crept the more the sun liked the sound. Eventually the sun rose completely in the sky and it listened and it really did like the cockerel’s song!
The light melted the darkness and the Earth warmed up. The people were amazed and, there and then, made a bargain with the cockerel that he should start crowing early every morning to attract the sun into the sky. In exchange, the people would look after and feed the cockerel and his hens forever or, for as long as the cockerel sang for the sun.
And that, ladies, gentlemen, and children of the world, is why cockerels crow every morning. Not just to attract the sun, but to ensure there’s an ample supply of corn. Once a cockerel makes a bargain you can be sure it’ll be kept. Thankfully.

7. Young Girl or Widow?…

Long ago, an old woman advised her nephew, that when he chose a wife, he should opt for either a young girl or a widow and to make sure she was good-hearted and honest. “Never choose a woman who has divorced her husband and never choose a girl who doesn’t obey her parents,” she advised sternly.
When the time came for the young man to take a wife, he remembered his old aunt’s advice but couldn’t decide between a young girl or a widow. He solved the problem by selecting two of each from a shortlist of eligible women in the area. Then of course, he had to test them for honesty and he devised a very, very, cunning plan!
The young man stole four ganders from his Lord and caged them in a secret hideaway. He then killed four of his own chickens, prepared them for the pot and showed the carcasses to his prospective wives. “These are four ganders I have stolen from our Lord to feed you,” said the young man, “but don’t tell anyone or I shall certainly be put to death.”
One of the widows and one of the young girls grabbed the food, cooked it and devoured it hungrily. Later that day the two women just couldn’t resist going to their neighbours and telling them they had just eaten the Lord’s ganders. They told everyone they met! It was while relating their story the women heard the Lord had posted a reward for the return of his ganders or information leading to the arrest of the thief. “There’s money to be made here,” decided the women, so they took themselves off to the Palace and told their story.
The Lord was very angry and had the young man arrested and brought before him. When asked if he had anything to say, the young man explained his plan to test and expose any weaknesses in his prospective wives and immediately arranged to have the four ganders returned. The Lord was impressed for he well understood the young man’s need to prove honesty. He forgave the young man, had the two women arrested and presented the young man with a gift of gold. “This is for your future,” said the mighty Lord, “but how are you going to decide between the other girl and widow?” The young man just smiled …

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Yours truly